Bah Humbug....

A belated Happy Xmas frock fans.  I feel I should wish you season's greetings even though I'm not a fan of this time of year!

Xmas is for small children, people who love Ferrero Rocher and those who come from large families.  I fit into none of these categories.

Once upon a time when I was a small being, Xmas was something to look forward to.  I remember going to visit the old bearded man in the so-called "department store" in Devizes but not really believing he was 'the' Father Christmas.  Even little old me wasn't that stupid.  How could anyone possibly travel as far as he did.  He only had one outfit too...which bothered me slightly.  There's something slightly strange about little kids sitting on an old stranger's knee once a year.  At any other time, he'd be arrested.

I remember finding an Xmas stocking at the end of my bed every Xmas Day but never hearing Mum put it there.  My Xmas stocking finds were probably more exciting than my main presents - no sweets for me but instead a pop music annual each year which my Mum probably still has stored somewhere- sorry Mum, I'll have them back one of these days.  I remember one year when I woke up to find no Xmas stocking (due to my visiting Aunt forgetting to put it out for me) and I was traumatised.  Seeing as I still remember this event probably 40 years on, this has scarred me for life!  This was nearly as bad as gorging myself on satsumas (easy to peel you know!) for a whole 24 hours and then projectile vomiting them out again for a further 24 hours.  I didn't eat a satsuma in years and the smell of oranges still makes me heave.

I remember getting great presents back then - a pogo stick (I was pogo stick champion in my own little world), roller skates, a Katy Copycat and so many books we didn't know what to do with them.  Mum must have saved her cigarette money up for many a week to afford these things but I played with them constantly and made it all worthwhile.

Those memories come from the late 60s/70s when I liked the simple things in life, didn't have a flat, a double bed or live in a place with shops that open over the holiday period.  Nowadays, we do the Xmas thing because we have to.  We reduced our present-giving this year - just one big one and one "useful" one each.  It works.  I came home with a lighter bag but with a bag full of things I wanted.  Think about it kids.  As much as I love to see my family, none of us really enjoy Xmas so perhaps next year, we'll not do it at all or, at my suggestion, give presents on a normal weekend in December.  I don't like being obliged to give presents on a certain day.  I like to think I'm a kind, generous soul and will give presents to who I like, when I like, thanks Father Christmas!

Sorry for the bah humbug blog folks....and sorry Mum & Gran that I didn't want to wear paper hats, play charades, or watch Only Fools & Horses for the umpteenth time.  Just joking readers....they would hate those things as much as I do!

and a P.S for anyone that believes in this sort of thing......guardian angels always show themselves on special days.